Endings

Endings give time for new beginnings. I think resigning that you have lost something is the wrong way of understanding the end. Obviously some pain comes along with taking some steps down the path in the opposite direction, as your muddy feet squelch into already defined bootprints, slightly misshaping them whilst you find your balance. The dark mud will slide around your toes, slipping between every least crevasse and filling the space entirely. The warm sludge holds you tight and when you stretch forward again, it will be along a never before seen path.

Essentially all this jargon just means; It is important to reflect on what you liked most, what you liked least and what caused the change to occur.

If you are reading a trekking map, just being able to hike isn't going to cut it. Direction is key.

If you walk into the dark woods, lean on a branch and it breaks. You need to determine what happened with you,
what happened with the branch and whether the forest had anything to do with the situation. I know it sounds like an anbalogy for a bad relationship... (and determining if it was you, them or the environment).. however that is not what I mean. Split it up into the key elements, for example; my yrdamon. What did I gain; diverse experiences, some independence in many ways (internal/external), an escape from responsibility and all of this in a environment where I my safety net was not secure. I wasn't in a comfortable position and hence was forced to adapt, learn and enjoy the hand which was dealt. For the prior couple of years I really learnt how to listen to my body and survive with some independence. Travelling alone takes away the comforts which allow you to build habits easily.. and forces you to flunder. I think flourishing in a hard situation will make you view the nest you built previously in a different light. The people you meet who are wholly embracing chaos are inspiring but the life is not for me. I am an engine builder in and out, and through these months I have built a ratty, grumbling mechanism; one I would never take on a highway.